Friday, November 13, 2009


The fact the I have an oncologist still sometimes takes my breath away....

Hunk and I got up the next morning and sat and drank our coffee together before waking the Rugrats. We love to watch the sunrise and have a few minutes to visit before the day begins....

Hunk left for work and I got the Rugrats ready and took them to school. When I came home I called and put an Ad in the paper and I also put it on an unemployment website. I thought it would be harder on me typing up the Ad then it was. I seemed to have a renewed strength that morning and was trucking right along. Doing what needed to be done.

I went to the barn and pulled out our suitcase and started packing. I shouldn't be down in Southern California long, just a night or two. We were just going to meet with the oncologist and discuss what our plan of attack would be.

My parents came over to stay the night with us so they would be there in the morning for the kids. Hunk and I needed to leave early to make it to my appointment on time.

It was a pretty quiet evening, I picked up the Rugrats, cooked dinner, enjoyed a nice family meal with everyone and turned in. My stomach was starting to get upset thinking about what lay ahead of me the next day...... You don't want to know where I end up sitting when my stomach gets seems to be a "family tradition".....get nervous.....well, I'm sure you get the picture......

The next morning we got up and headed down South. We arrived, checked in to our hotel that was located across the street from my doctor. The hotel gave us a discount since I was a patient of the Hospital. We relaxed in the room for a few and then headed across the street for my appointment.

Once in the office we were handed the normal 365 pages of paperwork to fill out as a "new patient", they took copies of our insurance card, paid the copay and sat and waited to be called.

It wasn't long and a bubbly lady came out and called us back. She lead me straight to the......ughhhhhhh........dare I say've guess it........straight to the SCALE! So rude.... I of course kicked of my shoes, sat down my purse and was wishing I could take off all my clothes. they had to at least weight 20 pounds, right? Ok, maybe 2......whatever...

She took us back to "the room" and we anxiously sat waiting for the doctor. When he came in there were a couple student doctors with him. I'll never ever ever forget the moment he walked into the room. He opened the door, they filed in. Introduced themselves, shook Hunks hand and turned to me. I think I was about to pass out. I said hello and he sat down on the stool at the end of the exam table I was sitting on. He placed his hand on my knee and said "Honey, of all the cancers in the world, why did you have to get this one? I'm so sorry".......

Now one would think this was a rude way to say "your chances of surviving this cancer SUCK" but if you had seen the warmth and concern in his face and eyes when he said it, it was coming from real concern and compassion. I wont forget what he said, but I also won't forget the look on his face when he said it.

He went on to tell us that they would need to rerun the biopsy report because it was wrong. He explained that with the high mitotic count I had it wasn't possible for it to be a low grade cancer as it had been written.


To be Continued...


  1. What a slow motion nightmare ... don't stop ... I want to know more!

  2. OH how I wish I could have been with you more through all of that cous! Did you actually start a journal or is this all just still etched in your mind?? Love ya for sharing it, hope you're ok sharing this with all of us too, if it ever gets to be too much, just STOP! we will all understand. Love you soooooooo much!

  3. I know it was all in a days work for him, but geeze, did he have to say it that way?!
    What an emotional roller coaster you must have been on at the time.

  4. I wish I could have been there holding your hand! I'm so sorry sissy but you are so strong and I know you get tired of people telling you that but you really are a strong person. Because you had to be for yourself and your family and still do. You really are capable of doing anything and are such an inspiration to me. LOVE YOU!!

  5. Thanks so much for your comments and your love and support!!

    You all are the best!!!

    Don't think I could write all this down if I didn't have you all to read and then support me.

    Thank you!!

  6. So glad your doc was compassionate... By the way, I take my shoes off to get weighed at the doc's office, too :)