Friday, October 1, 2010

LETTING GO...PUTTING ON MY BIG GIRL PANTIES..{Not always easy to do}

~LETTING GO~


Letting go is something we have to do so often, yet it's so difficult to do. 

From the time our children are little we are teaching them so that later we can "let them go".  They can't wait for that independence and yet we dread it.

Not just because we want to control them though I admit I struggle with this,because gosh darnit I KNOW BEST.  But because of the fear we have.  Will they get hurt?  How will the decisions they are making today affect them down the road? 


From the time we send them off to Kindergarten it starts.  Are they going to be able to find their classroom?  Is another someones little brat child going to pick on them?  Are they going to understand the work?  Will they make friends quickly?

Then as it moves on they enter high school and you have a whole new bag of worries.  Will they start hanging with the wrong crowd?  Will they start drinking or trying drugs?  Will they get into fights with someones big brat child.  Will they do their work and get good grades for college?  Will they want to attend college?  Will they be respectful to others?  WILL THEY MAKE ME LOOK LIKE A BAD PARENT?



AND then......then it happens.....  They get a drivers license.  The rest now seems like a cake walk.  You are putting your child  in God's hands.  We do this daily but NOW.......now I pray more often, now I pray even harder.  "Please God, just wrap your arms around him and get him to school safely"...... 

I already went through this my my oldest rugrat but now I'm doing round two.  I'm a spaz when it comes to cars.  I've lost two of my very good friends to car accidents.  I know it doesn't JUST HAPPEN TO OTHER PEOPLE...  This spins my head up a bit and makes me be a major freako about my rugats driving.  So my son has only been allowed to drive to the bus stop and back each day, and around our town here.  He has driven other places but always with Hunk or myself (usually Hunk, because as I expressed I'm a freako in the car) and he's done a great job.  BUT ehemmmmmmm  I'm a freako in the car and I want him to have more practice before he takes off up the hill and over that curvy pass and drops back down into town to his school.  (I feel sick just typing this).... Why?  Because my son called and the bus was pulling out as he was pulling in and he is now on his way driving to the high school.  He is going up that hill and over that curvy pass and dropping down into that town where his high school is.  I've already stopped and prayed.  I already shot a text out to my dear friend Sharon and she has already prayed.  Won't you join us?!  Ok, deep breaths and back to my post....
We have to let go.  We let go when they graduate high school and move on to college. 

We let go when they announce that they are getting married and some girl is taking my little boy from me and you are happy for them but it gives a little pain in the heart knowing things will be changing.  Knowing they need you less each year.  This is what we work towards from the time they are born, but why is it so hard to do when the time comes?



Aside from children there are other areas we have to let go of.  OUR YOUTH.  We keep dropping those pennies in the fountain of youth but one day it becomes obvious can't believe I'm going to admit this I will never have my 18 year old body back again.  DANGIT!  But if it came with the price tag of having my 18 year old mind back along with it, I think I would have to pass.  OH I thought I knew it all, just like my oldest rugrats think they do, but oh how I sooooooooooooo knew nothing.



We have to let go of loved ones who pass away.  We miss them, we grieve for them and then we have to learn to let that go.

Our lives are always changing.  New great things happening and the processing of letting go.  It's bitter sweet.


When I'm sitting on my front porch with Hunk, holding hands and  looking out over the lake drinking our morning coffee in peace I may like change.  When I don't have to rush around getting everyone ready for school or taking them to dance, guitar, wrestling or volleyball practice I may be grateful for that change.



Who am I kidding?  I'll have grand-rats running around in place of my rugrats and I'll be smiling every single step of the way.

In with the old and out with the new....A change is a-comin' like it or not.

So I'm going to try to  put on my big girl panties and deal with  look forward to it.

Spillin' it one coffee cup at a time,

~Momma~

PS..... I just called my son WHO WAS SUPPOSED TO CALL ME AS SOON AS HE GOT TO SCHOOL and he is there safe and sound..... my heart was pounding out my chest with each ring of the phone.....

I think I need therapy.

 "Where are those big girl panties when I need them"???

19 comments:

  1. I can remember when we were playing games and goofing around. Now i am watching my kids doing it. And now My grand daughter is. Each day we get older and older. Now i will be 44 next month two years younger than my dad when he died. There is no guarantee in life. One day at a time is all we have. Love you all and god bless. Stay close to god. It is the best thing we can do in this life.

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  2. Oh my gosh!! I can SO relate to this.
    It was hard losing the two oldest, things have went well. They are grown with children of their own. But now my baby is getting further and further away.
    How am I going to let go of the last one?!
    Keeping busy with him helped me get through the others growing up and leaving.
    **sniff**sniff**

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  3. My baby will be turning 16 in April. Do I dread this moment? Not as much as I dread him getting his permit and me teaching him to drive before he turns 16. I am sure he will do awesome, but the question is, will I? I don't deal well with change, and I can admit that now that I am getting older, I really do hate those wrinkles. But change can be good it just takes me a while to be OK with it. And I shoved my big girl panties all the way to the back of the drawer so it takes a little time to find them, the I embrace them and jump right in.

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  4. Oh, we are so in the same boat. Car Guy is currently at the DMV with Number One Son trying to get his Driver's License........my hear is pounding in my chest.....what if he doesn't get it? Will he be heart broken?!?! What if he does? Will I be heart broken?!? UGH!! Save room on the couch for me at the therapist's office!

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  5. Agree, agree, agree......
    My oldest daughter is 16 and so wanting to date, but I'm having such a hard time with it. I feel like I'm just setting good ground rules to protect her, but part of me just feels scared and not wanting to let go and trust her and God to make those tough choices.....it's so hard!

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  6. I remember Alpha Son & the driver's license. I HAD to trust God that angels surrounded & protect him (still do). It does get easier. I made a deal with him back then. I said, "Do NOT tell me any stories until years later, ok?" He didn't. Now when he tells me, "Oh yeah, when I was 17, I went into a ditch/had a near miss/almost hit a deer/almost slid off the mountain in the snow and ice..." I can just look at him calmly. I do thank God he did NOT tell me any stories until years later. It is the BEST deal you can make with your kids. DON'T TELL ME ANYTHING I DON'T NEED TO KNOW RIGHT NOW.

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  7. Oh and p.s.? Amazingly beautiful picture of you Miss Redhead! 'Course, the blonde chick up there has the same smile and is still amazingly beautiful.

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  8. No doubt about it, letting go is a tough one. We just have to take it a step at a time. One good thing -- our prayer lives grow like crazy :)

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  9. Wonderful post! You've explained what we all have to go through and said it beautifully. Sometimes we just have to "inhale" "exhale" and let go.

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  10. I love this post! How true it is...letting go is one of the hardest parts of life. My baby just started preschool so I'm at the very beginning of this awful letting go business with her. I'm quite sure I'll be starting prayer chains when she starts driving! Thanks for making me feel like a little less of a freak...it's comforting to know I'm not the only mom like this!

    I'm visiting from SITS =]

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  11. Great post -- I have 2 kids, 3 stepkids, 1 husband, a Marine brother, and 2 parents, and I want to organize all their lives, but I can't. I need to let go. My need for control is not my friend. And when I (we) let go, beautiful things happen. Other people grow and thrive, and unexpected good things happen for us too. Be brave, keep a clean pair of big girl panties on hand at all times! No holes preferably, either :)

    Visiting from SITS like Nikkolish :)

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  12. I am just beginning this, on the other end, with my oldest having started kindergarten this year. It's hard not to want to go in and get the kid who SPIT on mine.

    I have to admit, though, that I'd probably take my 18 year-old body back, even if it meant I had my mind from back then. Ahhhh, I was hot. ;)

    Stopping in to visit from SITS. Love your header and blog name- cracks me up!

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  13. Girl, you are so right. Loved this post! Change is so hard...but it's coming anyway. Thanks for the words of wisdom.

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  14. First of all... great artwork. Second, my mom said she never worried as much until we started driving, my guys are little but I know this will come quickly. Prayers for you all!!

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  15. Hi Stephanie, I know I already commented on this post but wanted to let you know that I'm doing a giveaway on my blog that you might like to try for. Head on over if you get the chance -- and have a good week!

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  16. I am sooo with you. All the more so as son had his first ever car accident just LAST NIGHT!!! And subsequently, first ever visit to the police station to fill in the report sheet this morning.

    Soooooo didn't sleep last night.......

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  17. Hello
    Congratulations for your blog.
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  18. Very well said!!!

    I used to feel sheepish for going straight into panic mode when one of my girls was away from the house and I could hear the wail of an ambulance in the distance ( I live in a really small town ) until my husband (their step father) came into the house (after a siren went by) and asked me where the girls were and am I going to call them to make sure they were ok. I guess you never stop worrying about them - ever.

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  19. Take it from a gal whose kiddos are 32 and 35 who threw out her 'big girl' panties when the kids moved out and got some sexy little thangs!!!

    Birds gotta fly and fish gotta swim but they come back bringin' friends, mates and grandkiddos galore. I have eight of 'em. The house is filled with love and laughter. Really...it's not so bad. :o)

    Ya'll have a most wonderfully blessed 'fall' day!!!

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