Thursday, September 24, 2009

A day in the lake isn't always better than a month in town.

This sign "A DAY AT THE LAKE IS WORTH A MONTH IN TOWN" sits in my living room window seal...Sorry you can't see it well in this photo..... Yes it's because I haven't figured out exactly where to hang it yet! Yes there is dust around it because it has been sitting there soooooooo long.... But we aren't talking about that right now. Right now we are talking about the "saying" and on most days I believe in this saying with all my heart...... But TODAY.... Yowza did we have fun in town!

It starts out by me rushing out the door to meet my friend "M"..... so I guess I was rushing because I just had to finish typing on my blog even though what I needed to do was save it and finish later..... and of course I was doing my 500 miles an hour down my dirt road when I realized I did not turn the generator off. YES, you did hear me correctly. GENERATOR... we have no PG&E, ohhhhhh we could have it if we wanted to cough up over $120,000.00!! So right now, I'm just doing my part in keeping the oil companies in business and I'm buying more than my fair share of diesel.

So I turned around and shut the generator down (or so I thought, but that is another story) and hit my 500 mph out the driveway, stopping at the gate letting most of the dust fly over me, opened and irkkkkk stop, got out closed the gate....vrmmmmmmmm off to the 2nd gate YES!YES! YES!, let the gates of heaven open and the angels sing..... the 2nd gate is open! And off I go. I had to slow down since I was on pavement (the main road as the kids call it). Pulled into the church parking lot (this is our meeting place of choice) and was only 1 minute late!! I gave myself the "YOU ROCK GIRL!" atta boy for my quick driving abilities and climbed into "M's" car.

We immediately started talking crap on people...... I mean......we immediately started talking about how wonderful our massages were going to be. I'm not sure we stopped talking the entire way, except to look at each other and wonder what the heck her GPS was saying to us (we were trying out a new Spa and "M" is always prepared.... Just like me...ummmm, well..... maybe not JUST like me BUT just like I strive to be, there we go.

So we pull into what we thought was the Spa...... NOPE it was a gated housing community, so we flip a U-turn and head back to the "MAIN ROAD" as we question Mrs. GPS again and WOLAAA (is that a word???) we are REALLY at the spa this time. We head in grab our paperwork (again, it was our first time at this spa so we had to give all the normal necessary name, age, how many times have you been married, what is the name and social security number of your neighbor and their children) and then we headed to the back.

Once we got to the back of the spa we were given robes and told to get nakie and get in the robes. Of course we were shown a dressing room (if we wanted) or we could change right there in the locker area. Well, being as shy as we are we chose to strip it down right there and throw our robes on..... we headed to the "Relaxation Room" and sipped tea while we waited for our massage therapists to come fetch us..... ahhhhhhhhh the feeling of being pampered..... of course the saying "You can take the girl out of the country, but ya can't take the country out of the girl" probably rings true for us.... But we did trying to keep our laughter to a low roar as we cracked ourselves up over nothing anyone else would probably find funny. (Like what one of the Real Housewives of Atlanta said on the last episode, that is forever stuck in my head)....

Our gals came to get us and take us to our rooms and ahhhhhhhhhh the massages began. They were so relaxing. My gal seemed more like a medical graduate than a massage therapist but I appreciated her knowledge. In all the times I've had massages I never learned so much about myself as I did today. Who am I kidding?!? I haven't even had my physician give me so much information! For instance, on my left side one of my ribs is sticking out (not because of lack of food TRUST ME.....apparently because of a muscle tension, it's pulling out one of my ribs) ohhhhh and my left hip is up higher than my right hip. My left hand is very tense but strong. Stronger than my right hand which she found odd because I'm right handed. My jaw was tense but she was able to fix that, she apologized in advance for the pain she was going to cause me to repair this little problem but did thank me afterwards for how well I tolerated the pain.... I told her I just curled my toes and it was all good...... Oh I also have a lot of muscle in my feet and should not sleep on my stomach. I'm sure I'm forgetting something but wow did I learn allot. Not so much relaxing going on (even though she did have ocean waves breaking in the back ground playing on her CD player) but highly educational. And who knows, after this visit my body........that I didn't know was so "jacked up"...... might just be on the mend now.

So when my hour was up she took me back to the Relaxation Room to meet up with my friend "M".... When "M" shows up we lounge in the chairs and realize there is a man walking back and forth by the window. There are sheer type drapes up but we could see it was a man and that he kept walking past. "M" suddenly feels she has solved the mystery as to why he keeps walking past. Remember when I said we decided we didn't need the dressing room but stripped down right there and hopped in our robes? "M" thinks he may have had a sneak peak......Well, she might be on to something, lets hope not!

Our friends "K "& the other "K" give us a call and are finished with their pedicures and are ready to meet up for lunch. We quickly change (and no we didn't go in the dressing room we were just quick and we didn't see the guy walk past even once!.....guess the first time was enough ... maybe too much....for him.. ) and we paid, jumped in the car and met our friends for lunch. It was sooooo much fun!

"K" and the other "K" are two of the sweetest people you could ever meet. They also aren't exactly like "M" and myself. They don't ever walk out the door without makeup and their hair done. They always have the cutest outfits with their matching jewelry. Not to mention they both weigh about as much as my right leg (you know the one that sits slightly higher than my left side).....But I just don't hold that against them..... I may feel like screaming EAT so I don't feel so fat around you.......but I hold it in......swallow it down with my fettuccine and bread......ohhhhhhh the bread was soooooooo good....... All that to say I just love my friends! And they love me, all of me (not just my right *jacked up* leg)....

We left the restaurant (after OH YES, you guessed it discussing and laughing about my favorite part on the Real Housewives of Atlanta again) and went shopping.

Old Navy was having such killer deals today. Especially for the guy that snuck into the store, stuffed the big blue bag full of clothes and snuck out the door (without the YOUR STEALING CRAP FROM OUR STORE alarm going off) and ran down the sidewalk and got away. He really got a killer deal. The two gals working were not about to chase him, and we didn't blame them. There was another lady who was shopping and said she used to work at a store so she knew how to spot shoplifters and she said that she spotted him right away, watched him and informed the two gals working there exactly what he was going to do. She kindly explained all of this to us on our way to our car. She told us how it all went down and how their security must have been on lunch..... she was cracking herself up. I really had to hold back the urge to ask her if she watched the Real Housewives of Atlanta, she obviously knew how to have a good laugh and more importantly proved she loved to talk and nobody was a stranger (maybe she is my sister from another life)...

So I wont bore you with all the errands we ran but will rather get to the nice ALMOST (key word) peed my pants part of the day. COSTCO... see "M" and I get all our items (we so desperately needed, including the diet pills that have a warning on the label that I will have anal leakage if I eat fatty foods......but come on after eating lunch with "K" and the other "K" who wouldn't feel obligated to purchase diet pills!) and we headed to the check out line. Well, "M" being the dear friend she is points out that we really should get an ice cream that is hand dipped in milk chocolate and rolled in almonds... I mean it had been at least 2 hours since we ate all the pasta and bread (and salad, there was something healthy in that meal!) so we deserved one, NO we OWED it to ourselves to have this treat. It's all my mom's fault, she pointed these out to me one day and ughhhhhh, lets just say it must be a weeks worth of calories in that one ice cream bar!..

Now to the good part. We have our chocolate dipped ice cream bars and we are heading out into the California heat with lots of napkins. Problem? Well, we are pushing carts filled with the food we had just purchased (oh and the diet pills, which I didn't take yet because I'm thinkin' that ice cream has lots of fat in it and anal leakage and her car seat might not be a good idea...) and we are trying to eat our ice creams before they melt. We load the car, with one hand, so we can continue eating. Then we get what is known as "a clue" and I hold her ice cream while she quickly loads. I jump in the car while she returns the carts and something flies as I go to sit down. I'm thinking at this point that I must have lost a napkin and I'm sooooooooooo NOT going to chase after it. I plop down, close the car door and hold the ice creams over the A/C vents to try to keep them cool. My friend "M" is running back to the car when I hear her crack up laughing (VERY LOUDLY....that is how we roll) and I'm thinking "oh, ha ha, she sees me holding the ice cream in front of the vents, ha ha ha, this is too funny" and then I get a glimpse in the side mirror of the car and something catches my eye. I look again (mind you "M" is still laughing and even has a man turning around to see what she finds so funny) and it is my Costco receipt somehow stuck in the door handle of the car. (sorry I just laughed out loud sitting here by myself typing this....maybe you just had to be there)..... I figured out why she is laughing, it's not my A/C vent ice cream cooling system...... it's my I'm a dumb butt and my receipt is stuck in the door handle.

"M" climbs in the car and we run through what just happened, well, because that is what we do. So "M" is laughing and DROPS HER ICE CREAM ON THE FLOORBOARD OF THE CAR!!! Mayday! Mayday! Ice Cream down..... someone send in the troops! We both scream "ahhhhhhhh" but more of a high pitched scream (not sure how to type that) and I yell out "5 second rule", she yells something I probably shouldn't type and states she is eating it no matter what!!! I helped her pick the HAIR off of her ice cream (cuz I'm just such a good friend) and she EATS IT!. We wonder if our skinny butt friends "K" and the other "K" stopped off and got a 365,989 calorie ice cream too..... They could have done this before they hit the gym. I just don't understand why they are skinny and we aren't. Maybe they take anal leakage pills too. It is a mystery I guess I will never solve. sighhhhhhhh

We drove home, after we sat in the parking lot and finished our ice cream bars. And as much laughing as we had I'm thinkin' we may just have burned enough calories to make up for a few of the almonds we ate on our chocolate dipped vanilla ice cream bars! Makes me feel much better knowing this. I was starting to feel just a little guilty.

So, though a day on the lake can be so much better than a month in town to me on most days. Today's day in town was spent laughing with some of my best friends, getting a massage by what most likely was a physician disguised as a massage therapist and eating a massive amount of calories. It just doesn't get much better than that!


No comments:

Post a Comment