An organized person seems to have a calmness about them that I just don’t seem to poses, often enough. I seem to have this sense of urgency off and on throughout the day. Followed by a feeling of not getting everything accomplished that needs to be accomplished throughout my day.
Most people are interrupted at least one time in every 5 minute time period. If this is true for you, analyze what’s causing those interruptions. Your situation is going to be different than mine or than your best friends or your neighbors. We all have different things that disrupt our days. If you haven’t paid attention to the loss of time in your day take the time to do that now. You will be shocked by how much of your time is whittled away by these interruptions and disturbances.
Think of ways that you can protect the time you have each day. There is nothing wrong with telling someone that you can’t meet them at the time they suggest, or maybe even not at all that day. It’s ok to say I can meet you at 10:15 or 7:40 exactly…..I can’t be there at 10:00 or at 7:30. Whatever the case may be. Even your best friend and your family members can learn not to interrupt.
What I’ve learned is many time “I” am the cause of my interruptions. Is this true for you? Do you insist on checking email every few minutes or answering your phone or cell phone even when you are in the middle of something important? Can’t the call wait a minute? Why do we feel just because someone is calling at that moment that we have to stop what we are doing an answer it. It’s even thought of as very rude if we do this. I’m not suggesting that we screen all calls but there is a time when answering that phone is going to cause a chain reaction for the day. Maybe you are running out the door. You stop to answer the phone and now you are late for the kids bus stop, which now requires you driving them to school, which then makes you late for your dentist appointment. You get the idea. But something about that ringing makes us think we HAVE to stop and answer. We will even cause ourselves to be late because we forgot our cell phone at home and we have to go back and get it. What did we do before cell phones? I'm guilty of this. What if my Rugrats try to call? What if Hunk tries to call? What if? What if?
I think if we are going to learn to control our chaos and get organized we need to prioritize. We need to respect our time. If we don’t respect our time, others certainly won’t know how to respect our time. They won’t even know they aren’t respecting it. How could they, if we don’t set boundaries?
We can’t give 100% to everything at the same time.
This has in the past caused me to feel like I’m not a good enough Momma, not a good enough wife, not a good enough friend and not a good enough office manager. This is a rut I just don’t want to be in. I know I can’t be everything at once but when I’m doing the role of each of the things that makes up who I am I want to know I am doing my best while I’m doing it.
This caused some recent changes that I’m not thrilled with but I’m already finding to be in the best interest of my family.
Many of you know that we own our own company. Since moving I’ve tried working mainly out of my home and only going to the office when I have to. Hunk brings items home from the office for me etc.
PROBLEM: I’m easily distracted at home with phone calls, laundry, dishes, running to lunch with a friend ok……….and Lifetime Movie Network……there I said it……I know you were waiting for it. =) I’m not respecting my time and spending it wisely. I’m allowing and even at times encouraging interruptions.
But the biggest problem is space, lack organization, and having everything I need when I need it. And, importantly, Hunk can only do so much. When he is working at a site it is hard for him to answer the office phone that is transferred to his cell phone because we can’t transfer it to the house because I leave to pick up the Rugrats or I’m in town doing errands or whatever I may be doing……..
I came to a realization that this isn’t working. The fact that I want to be a 100% stay at home momma is great but it’s not my reality right now. I am grateful that my children are all in (and out) of school and at least I don’t have little ones at home……I can imagine the pain I would feel then. And many do feel this pain daily. They do this because they are doing what they need to do for their family. I have to step up to the plate and do the same. Sure I can hire someone full time back in the office but I would still need to be in to oversee them AND lets not forget pay them a salary that probably isn’t a good idea to take on right now. But with this economy we are blessed to be so busy and each and every customer needs to be treated in a way that makes them feel as important to us as THEY ARE.
RESOLUTION: I’m back in the office from 8am to 5pm each day. I do have a part time helper 2 days a week but other than that it’s all me now. The phone is answered every time it rings. When I need a file I can pull it, when I need to file something I can. Our office is right next to our shop which gives me quick access to job sheet and time cards that our employees fill out without having to wait for Hunk to bring them home to me.
DOWN SIDE: My daughters have to stay at after school club for 3 hours each day except for Wednesday when Grandpa picks them up and take them to guitar lessons after school. The funny thing is they have begged for years to be able to stay after because they do crafts and play with friends. So they are excited. Me……..not so much. But this is my reality right now.
UPSIDE: The office has never run more smoothly. Customers are excited at how quickly I am taking care of their needs and that when they can’t reach Hunk they are able to speak with me and a good majority of the time I am able to help them. Along with fielding some of his phone calls I’m also able to help Hunk with scheduling of jobs and other small things that help him concentrate on what he needs to be doing.
Being active in our Rugrats life is a MAJOR PRIORITY for both Hunk and myself. There will be times when one of us are away (for instance Hunk is at camp with our daughter and her school this week) and the other will do their best to pick up the slack and cover. This times will happen and we will deal with them. But on a normal daily bases this is our/my new reality.
I was whining to a friend about how sad I was but that if I was on the outside of our business knowing what I know about our business and I was advising the owner as to what needs to happen my advise wouldn’t match the actions I was taking……….I had to stop doing what I WANTED to do and doing what I NEEDED to do.
She said something that helped me put this in to perspective. She said “Remember when you were so upset about selling your beach house? How you said you didn’t have to sell it but it was probably for the best. How it would make your monthly payments less stressful?” I said “Oh ya, I remember” She said “Well, you cried when you sold it but the next month when you didn’t have to make the payment and your finances weren’t as tight you said it was the best thing you had ever done.” I said “Yes, it is the best thing to happen in hind sight.”
She thinks working in the office full time will be like selling my Beach House. It hurts a little because it’s not what I want in a perfect world. But in the end I will see that it was for the best. It will relieve a lot of stress and I believe our business can only improve more because of it. And the reality is that when I would pick my Rugrats up from school, when I got home I had to keep working because I had too much to do. Or Hunk would call and need something and he’d have to wait because I was running to the bus stop. Those are all stress factors that may not be eliminated but they will greatly reduced.
The fantastic thing about this is………..if it doesn’t work I can change it. And this morning when my alarm didn’t go off and I had to drive my son to school which caused me to be 45 minutes late, I didn’t have to worry about getting written up by my boss…….. There is always a bright side right?
So pick a day and make yourself very aware of what is triggering chaos in your home. Is it because you are over scheduled or are you just not having enough respect for your time?
See what changes you can make to move toward a more peaceful lifestyle.
I’m still working on mine…….but wanted to share what I’ve been learning/trying along the way.
Ciao Bellas~
Wednesday, March 31, 2010
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OMG Steph your last few blogs have been ME, the organization, the key thing and now this! today, since I have been released by doc to resume my normal activities I am organizing a few rooms here at home, I already did the office space a few months back and what a difference!! now its on to one particular bowls/plastics cabinet in the kitchen that makes it so hard to find the right bowl or lid or BOTH and unloading the dishwasher is BRUTAL! so thats next! I am the same way with the phone too-alot of that, at least for me, comes from: A)having a kid, :what if he needs me!" B)home based business, "what if" hubby needs something while I'm in town, C. when both the moms were so bad I was always on "alert" D. I worry about something happening to dad and E. since my panic attacks started a few years ago I WILL NOT LEAVE the house w/o it so the phone thing will take awhile lol but yes, we make ourselves way to convenient for everyone, we feel like we can't miss that call and God forbid we travel to a place with no cell service!! it's sad and at least for me, it makes me anxious, but I am trying to overcome at least some of these problems-babty steps, baby steps, I keep telling myself lol
ReplyDeleteWow this hit home. I've been "talking" about the home organization thing so I quit wasting time - you asked which it was? Not having enough respect for my time. When most of our stuff was packed up and sitting in the workshop from the aborted house move, our home was so peaceful and simply organized (everything was in boxes in the shed, ho). We decided we wanted to continue that peace and simplicity - and it's been absolute murder on me. I procrastinate because I don't want to get rid of some of the stuff... yet I didn't need it before and don't need it now... but what if?
ReplyDeleteI need to change my attitude and respect my time more. I need to be way more organized. This was a great post - thanks!